hundred & eighteen

You wrote a story on my skin and sent me adrift like a message in a bottle. And now I’m waiting for someone else curious enough to carefully make sense of the words I’ve been covered in. Perhaps this time, they’ll write new secrets in permanent ink and keep me for themselves. 

hundred & seventeen

I don't miss you as you are. I miss you as you pretended as to be. I miss the potential, the inspirational, the curiosity. I've seen you now, and I don't recognize it. I'm missing the parts of you that were always missing.

hundred & sixteen

Flashbacks come in strings of sentences you once said. One lays on my heart. And then the next. And then the next. Stacking and stacking until my mind is overwhelmed with uncommitted intentions and my eyes are overwhelmed with tangible sorrow. It's an all-consuming weight being pressed deeper my only whispered plea is for sleep to come quickly. 

hundred & fifteen

My phone vibrates on the sheets beside me and I'm suddenly full energy. I see the sun come up as my battery dies down and the playful conversation comes to an awkward halt. Maybe we'll talk soon. Maybe we won't. But until then, tell your girl I'm sorry. 

hundred & fourteen

I'm not entirely sure what it is about a dark room and an open flame but as of late it has felt more inviting than your name on my phone and I am proud of that.

hundred & thriteen

Though I wonder what it would be like to wake up confident and courageous I do believe there is something beautiful in the humility of the shadows I've found myself in. 

hundred & twelve

What if instead of looking at our precedents as precautions we look at them as ammunition? What if instead of looking at our mistakes as losses we look at them as progression? Maybe then we’d learn to redefine our limits rather than redefining our goals.